Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
I found it funny that her boobs actually kinda felt like a bag of sand. the 40 year old virgin should feel better about himself.
She was either really drunk or really not interested. Everytime I tried to ask her about herself she would respond with a line from Stepbrothers.
Why did you leave me a note saying 'find the canary'
You can duct tape yourself to me so we dont lose you and you dont have to celebrate your birthday alone
She sucks dick like Beethoven on piano, but talking to her is like Simple Jack in Tropic Thunder. Still working out the pros vs cons list.
Christ, I really took the slutcake last night.
Wait. Someome brought slutcake?
I inhaled my own vomit, how was your night?
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
"hahahaha" is not a sufficient reply when I tell you my mother laughed at a joke about me giving blowjobs.
I have post one night stand depression
From now on he's gonna have to shave first. It feels like I got eaten out by a chainsaw!
Between falling off a shelf on to a concrete floor and sex with you - i may never walk again.
Randomize
