Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
Class is significantly more awkward when you know that your teacher knows what you look like with your legs behind your head... Just saying.
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
I'm still getting random messages from guys about my Halloween outfit. Electrical tape is coming back next year
Until you can top getting paid to have women tell you to check out their ass, my job will remain better than yours
I might as well just sew it shut at this point.
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
I ate so much cake that I can't even enjoy a blowjob
That's the most first world problem I've ever heard in my life.
So I "accidentally" brought my road beers into church for this wedding
And they fell out of my pocket on the pew. Made quite a noise...safe to say I'm batting a thousand
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
Randomize
