Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
Drunk me Does not appreciate a drunk, naked you kicking me off the couch at 3am. You have a bed here, you dick
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
I'd feel bad about being drunk at the Christmas service, except for the fact that I've already had sex in this church, so this is just small change.
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
Poorly worded request for dick pic resulted in stoned beanie selfies and "lol". Miscommunication is the devil's cock block.
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
TIL a potato cannon can be loaded with dildos as ammunition. Boy, do our neighbours love us!
In hindsight, I probably should not have let the waiter give me a chiropractic adjustment on my neck last night.
Is there an "I fucked your brother" emoji?
I'm gunna wear a purple dress, so if you see someone looking confused and lost wearing purple it's probably me
look im sitting on my bathroom floor in my underwear snorting cocaine can we talk about this later
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