you keep denying me to hang out, should i take a hint?
you keep asking me after midnight, should i take a hint?
i just renamed my vag "the sorting hat"
I just bedazzled my weight watchers points calculator. You can tell I'm gay.
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
I made Mark strip for me and do a stripper dance. I put 2 dollars in his mouth
Let's just not urinate on things that don't need to be urinated on
But you can't tell me I give the best blow jobs and then not break up with your girlfriend who has fucking TMJ! Come on!
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
right now I am washing the alcohol and shame off from last night
Stoner thoughts are the only thoughts I want to have now.
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
Randomize
