I just did the classiest thing ever.
last time you said that you got chlamydia.
I just had sex with a black guy. He told me I had a big dick. I think that's God's way of saying it's okay to be gay.
Are my feet made of real feet?
Walk-of-shaming home in that dress you got arrested in. Six guys called out your name when I walked past. I've never been more proud of us.
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
When you're not at your house I assumed you're somewhere having sex
I think John will remember that birthday for a while. I'm still dying at the fact a stripper was hunting me down.
Yeeah, I think a threesome is one of those wedding presents you can't register for at Bed Bath And Beyond..
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
FML I accidentally sent the text about his bruised balls as a group text that included his brother and my boss.
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard
I tried to breakup with him by telling I had a threesome. He one upped me by saying he had a 5-some so I couldn’t do it.
Gotta love college... Pregamed for my 8:30 flight home this morning and gave the flight attendants all high fives when I got on the plane. Best ride of my life.
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
Randomize
