I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
I am in a vortex of obligation.
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
I just negotiated a blow job for an interview.
Our halfway to Halloween party needs to never happen again. There were waaayy too many wasted cartoon characters passed out in my living room this morning...
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
He and I are basically the same person, except he has a glorious penis and I have glorious breasts.
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
Accepting his friend request would be the Facebook equivalent of pity sex.
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
So I missed the eclipse because I was masturbating.
Randomize
