he told me he saved a turtle in the middle of the road.. i told him id be over in ten minutes...i mean he deserves a bj after that.
I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment
Personally I think it's a tremendous investment
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
You are not about to raise that baby deer, you can BARELY raise yourself... Return it to it's mom now.
Morning yack off the fire escape. Girl walking by was mortified. Gooooooooo Ducks!!
I want to be you.
Dear slutty diary: I lied about feeling guilty of being a homewrecker in order to have more sex. it worked.
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
I can't name a single part of my body that isn't sore. Who says break up sex is bad sex?
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
i'm eating chex mix in the shower while texting. i feel accomplished.
My feet surprised me
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
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