Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
It has come to my attention that I should apologize for myself and my friends
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
did i by any chance text you anything about feathers last night?
you mean faeutihaers?
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
Everything was good until you pulled the bartenders hair because she cut you off
Which is worse rug burn on your nipples or laying there after wondering how long you have to cuddle before you can sneak away?
He wouldn't give me a cup of water for my bong so i sat in the drive thru to run up the timer until he gave it to me.
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
I used my yoga mat as a door stop so he couldn't come into my room when i was sleeping last night. Drunk engineering at its finest
Dude. I'm no longer allowed to use my sword when drinking. I just spent 20 min cleaning up popcorn. I stabbed Moe in the leg and chopped his door knob off
Turns out he's just a recently divorced IT guy. Not a wizard.
My sinuses still burn from snorting red wine last night.
She told us she had powers and that eating tree bark cures the shits.
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
Randomize
