he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
Yeah we had sex for the first time last night and all the text he sent me afterwards said was “heh”
She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
I just turned in a 4 page paper spelling absolute as "absolut" every single time. I'm an alcoholic
Working out to an exercise video on OnDemand. Also, drinking beer and eating cream cheese with a side of bagel in between stretches.
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
A houseboat for a bachelor party is a terrible idea, we nearly die when on dry land, so how the hell are we supposed to survive a 3 day binge on a massive lake?
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
He insisted he brought his alarm clock everywhere, and then the girl screamed "fuck French people!"
Feel like I died but someone put me In a human microwave and I got back to life.
i want to live in a society where a 20 year old can wear pigtails and not get them called handlebars, because i look fucking adorable in them.
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
I think the cashier at 7/11 might be planning an intervention for me.
Randomize
