I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
i wish there was a holiday celebrated with pizza eating
We lit firecrackers from NYE in the fireplace and he was so passed out that he slept through it.
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
Houston, we have a squirter
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
Last night I dreamt that I sold my car and used the money to have wheels surgically implanted in my feet and legs so I became a human heely and I just rolled everywhere
Oh my lord it is too early in the morning to be that horny freak
my vagina doesn't wear a watch
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
That was fun and all, but let's never have sex on a ladder ever again.
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
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