Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
Some girl just toasted to friendship and love. I want to break her neck.
no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
some girl in front of me in class just googled "hungover+throwing up blood"
I joined a mariachi band. they gave me a guitar because i told them i could play. It actually turned out ok
They kicked me out of the mariachi band. Turns out I'm not that good
Hunting for men at chipotle... I feel like I should be more disappointed that this is the way my life is going but I'm really just excited for the potential.
Tried to dry my shoes in the oven last night.
how did you know i stayed over last night?
there was a trail of glow sticks and cheetos from the front door all the way to his bedroom
Just to be clear, the only reason you're allowed to scream "COCKTAIL SERVANT" at bartenders is because you have nice tits
I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.
I tried to break it off with the married one. He offered to pay off my car.
The side bitch struggle is real.
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
I've talked to too many cops in one week and I haven't even committed any crimes. I hate the suburbs
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
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