Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
he saw my "i like bacon" magnet on the fridge and i told him how much i love meat, then we started making out
what a beautiful fairy tale
I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.
She said her first boyfreind was so small she is still technically a virgin.
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
Texas State Troopers call you ma'am even when they arrest you for public nudity and after you've puked on their cruiser. Country boys raised right.
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
I don't know who's more excited for you to come home. Me or my vagina
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
Whoops. I'm a horrible gf, I dropped the "I'm looking for jobs in a different city" bomb before I wished him a happy anniversary
AND I woke up to eggs in my bra. Thanks Taco Cabana...
I JUST SNEEZED WITH A MOUTHFUL OF CHEWED UP CASHEWS AND THEY CAME OUT MY NOSE AND IT HURT AND NOW I HAVE A LITTLE NOSEBLEED
Turns out the grown up version of seeing your teacher shopping is seeing your therapist is on tinder
Randomize
