there should be a national holiday dedicated to how high i am
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
We stole your phone last night, texted your brother and told him you wanted it up the ass by him. All he said was "I want ur money."
Hint of advice dont get with minor league baseball players, you can google their stats but not their stds.
We're drinking vodka. Wine is for people who have to wake up in the morning.
I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
When you put my balls in your mouth i just want to buy you expensive gifts...you know what i mean?
just remember the most important rule of taking psychedelics: monsters can't get through blankets
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
Visions of polite missionary are dancing in my head right now kinda and it alarms me
I'm kind of upset that he wanted to have sex instead of watch Harry Potter. I mean it's Harry fucking potter.
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
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