Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
I just wanna not walk straight. Is that too much to ask for?
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
If this outfit doesn't get me pregnant tonight I don't know what will...
I just hate that one day I'll have to tell our children how we met, makes me look like a gold digging whore
I seriously doubt I'm gonna be able to properly put your dick in my mouth whilst upside down, but I'm willing to give it my best shot
Haha, how do I word that nicely? "You got me to the edge of no return twice and failed to let me orgasm, therefore you owe me chicken nuggets or hot wings. Your decision"
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
I told you I couldn't sleep because of the speed and you rolled over and replied "shh. just pretend."
This is like the fourth time this month I've woken up hungover in someone's backyard
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
Randomize