i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
haha I love it when I find out that girls who were mean to me in middle school are now some random dude's baby mama. thanks, facebook.
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
He chipped a tooth on the first beer. You know the night is just going to be a slushy mess after that.
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
5 minutes Isn't even long enough to bring me even close to an orgasm. How selfish. Think about baseball and fuck me you idiot.
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
I gave three different guys a boner at the same time last night, and none of them are in the same city as I am. That's achievement.
Tried to shave my legs but the rug burn on my knees from last night got in the way.
If one more dude who finds out I'm a cop asks to see me in uniform I'm gonna become asexual
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
Randomize
