I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
I'm beginning to think I'm sterile because I definitely should be pregnant by now.
In retrospect pumpkin carving while drinking Patron was a bad idea.
i think i left a case of beer in your dryer
I have so many hands. So. Many. Hands. I can feel arms that I don't have yet. They tickle. I can see the blood in my eyes. I think something is happening. The hands!!! I'm ticking myself with hands I don't have yet! I can't stop giggling about my notyet hands!
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
you cant ever make fun of my bong's stick on moustache again. its the reason the cop let me keep it and my weed.
ugh... fuck pirate breakfast. my head is like thirsty.
I feel like there should be a 'roommate information section' of the paperwork when there's a chance you'll be given pain killers.
I've never known a porn star before
There's not even an emoji for this
We didn't get home until 4 am. Her mom let us in, confessed that she had sex with someone she worked with and said he had a small penis. I love this family.
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
I almost wrecked my car because of a guy in skinny jeans had a boner
Randomize
