Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
Do vagina's smell?
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
There is a pink thong attached to a bottle of svedka hanging from my ceiling fan..is this yours?
He's coming back with me for the week. It took me saying "I don't wanna drive myself home... I'm better as a passenger giving road head" for him to jump at it. Rack another one up for my magical openings.
I asked him to explain what he meant by "hooking up" in paragraph form
Then you're three pancakes deep in regret.
Is Oprah even human
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
Hey! How are you feeling? Still preferring soup over sex?
What is it in my brain that makes me look at a penis and think "that belongs in my mouth"?
I’m sorry, some of us common-folk don’t have access to steady dick
I'll text you tomorrow when I'm not in someone's torture cave if I don't by noon call for help.
Randomize