Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
My hair reeks of homosexuality.
to be honest..when i was little i used to think sharks can swim out of drains and eat people
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
i dont care if i have to wear a pillow case, there will be an open bar at my wedding
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
i take my contacts out every time we fuck so i cant see all the stretch marks
He told me to put on my big boy pants, then take them off and fuck her before he smacks me with a chair. His pep talks suck.
seis de mayo is my least favoite holiday because i usually spend it in bed sobbing over my poor life decisions from the night before.
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
Im drunk taking pregnancy tests with this really hot girl...i dont know what is happening
How do I tell my boss I have slutty fantasies about him, me and his conference room table?
Randomize
