so i'm sitting in his room drinking tequila from the bottle and watching harry potter. he's jacking off to some porn a couple feet away from me. at one point i look over and see that he's watching me instead of the porn. please help me figure out how warped it is that i found that romantic
I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
I asked my mom if I was the drunkest one in the room. With 8 days till I go back to school, I couldn't care less about being shitfaced at a baptism
She's singing So Happy Together to her burrito, I want to be on her level.
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
we found you in the closet, clutching coats that werent yours for stability
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
Unemployment check just came in. As soon as I stop pretending I have morals I'm buying weed. Puff puff pass uncle sam.
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
Happy Birhtday!
Dad, it's 3am and it's not my birthday... wherever you are, go home
you know, i'm always afraid you're going to think i only want you for sex because i only text you when i'm horny
speaking of, guess what i'm thinking about
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
There are leaves in my underwear?
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