How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR.
gonna sleep on the stairs... to drunk to keep going up, way to drunk to go down, gonna find a comfy spot right here... its safer that way
My dealer, who also happens to be a male stripper, just invited me to watch him perform tonight. Boundaries buddy, boundaries.
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
Just hooked up on shake weight girl's dad's porsche. What are YOU doing with your life?
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
NEVER LET ME DO THIS AGAIN I FEEL LIKE I'M GONNA SHIT MYSELF TO DEATH ARGHHHHHGHHG IS THIS WHAT DYSENTERY FEELS LIKE
i'm going as a slutty football player, and all night i'll drunkily whisper "id love to catch your balls." into random strangers ears.
Thank god crabs can't live on your head. Thank god.
I may or have may not just taken a swig out of a jar of alfedo sauce in my fridge. Dont judge me
I'm trying to poop and took acid, this is going to end horrid or wonderful. Oh the amusement park, not the pooping.
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
I'm still drunk dear. I just woke up 3 feet from the front door with 20 dollars worth of taco bell in my hands.
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