i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
"Party in the USA" was played at church youth group last night. It was like everything I enjoy hating was aligning against me.
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
Package from mother. Contents: Cookies, my old pokemon cards, and condoms. Note: "These have a July 2010 expiration date so give them away or use them with a gal that would be a great daughter in law. Love Mom" Love you too momma
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
We found him. He was passed out in a McDonalds booth with at least 6 big Mac wrappers. The employee said he kept yelling that he was in America and had the freedom to have big macs. Fucking Italians...
I've never been so tempted to check my phone during sex in my life.
apparently I like to do this thing where I wear pretty dresses and then pee on things on public. Picture proof. Four times last week.
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
The girls said some drunk guy in footie pajamas was asking for me when they opened the doors. I thought we agreed you were gonna stay home and microwave me some bacon.
Randomize
