worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
i just woke up and "where the fuck is taco bell" was in my search engine...
While she was crying about breaking up, he looked at her through his fork and said "of course she's upset, she's in jail." Having sex with him tonight.
im vomiting on the 4th floor cause no one knows me there
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
She thought someone was breaking in but when I said it was me she got even angrier and threw a coffee mug at my head.
Everyone looked at me like I just fucked a gopher and was wearing it like a hat
He's such a gentleman. He didn't even ask why my bra was flung on the seat of my car. He just took my snow brush, pushed it onto the floor and said, "Let's go I'm hungry."
He brought her home and fucked her in a gingerbread man costume in a cardboard rapunzel castle. He had a pretty good night.
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
They finally caught us and banned us forever, but it was worth it because we didn't have to pay for light bulbs for at least 3 years.
So you stole light bulbs, from your favorite bar, and got banned, and you're happy?
Look we couldnt pay for light bulbs and ramen, and you can't eat light bulbs or cook in the dark. Win - win.
DO NOT THROW SOUP AT YOUR SCREEN
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
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