Mmmm, vodka for breakfast
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
I THREW AWAY MY VIBRATOR BECAUSE IT INTIMIDATED HIM. WORST. DECISION. EVER
Nothing like an old fashioned, wine fueled, anxiety-cry in the shower to start off finals week.
It's 6 a.m. ... what the hell.
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
The best part about drinking boxed wine is you can blow up the bag and use it as a pillow
I haven't been hungover in so long I'm actually looking forward to it
I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.
Woke up pants less in the vacant apartment across the hall. It was unlocked because they were showing it to someone. When they walked in I woke up and said "this is a great place to live" and walked out
In my top drawer right now, there are see's chocolates, condoms, weed, and my vibrator. One way or another, this is going to be a good night
...is this motivational speaking, or sexting? It's getting hard to tell.
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
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