it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
Holy shit. Do you realize what this means? Officially all of my ex-bfs are either dead or gay
Thank god i puked near the cancer center. makes me look like a chemo patient
Out of all the things I've put my penis in, this seems the most unfortunate.
we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.
My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
I have a fantastic sense of humor but being called a merman isn't funny
I fell asleep in the bathroom during my mothers dinner party with no pants on. Her friend walked In. I was told to not come back.
I decided to have a date tonight. Back on horse I go. Or aiming to be on a horse cock one day. You know. However that metaphor goes.
Your shirt... Was in my pants
At some point the phrase "I've hit rock bottom" stopped having a meaning and became my general state of life
What the fuck were you guys talking about?
Lube wrestling.
Oh, makes sense.
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