Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
There are just some things I refuse to put in my mouth.
Eric said he heard us having sex the other night. He said i did a great job.
She told me that she had to rub her face against me because she was part cat.
Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
I made friends with the delivery guy because he had beautiful dread locks and was a Zelda fan. He texted me after he left saying he wasn't trying to be creepy but we should be friends. We're hanging out tomorrow.
How does this kind of shit happen to you?!
what's the least obnoxious place that i could barf on the bus?
DO NOT LET HIM TAKE CONTROL OVER YOUR BOWELS
I wanted to give everyone gifts as they left the house... So when your wondering where most of the christmas ornaments are I'm really sorry.
I'm not too sure what happened last night, but by the looks of it, we must have gotten drunk with zebras.
I would like you to know, a bag of cheese cubes just attacked me at work.
Randomize
