Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream
She compared sex to doing dishes."You scrub them until they're wet."
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
Im only pretending to be his friend so I can sleep with his girlfriend.
It's my first ever "i'm sorry for my excessive drug use" hand turkey. And I think it's pretty boss.
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
Regret, thy taste is box wine.
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
My sister just showed me a snap chat that I don't remember sending, it was a picture of me with two big macs in my bra with just the words "BURGER TITS"
You're now part of the minority of friends who haven't seen my boobs.
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
Randomize
