I feel like our house is getting pulled over.
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
you are not my drinking buddy, you are my drinking enemy.
Can I just say I love that you have a kegorator on your wedding registry?
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
Flacco has been sacked like 7 times. His name also auto corrects to Flaccid. That's so sad
I'm just going to assume my unresponsive booty calls are just preparing for the women's march tomorrow
He was the perfect gentleman on our first date. Took me out for candlelit dinner at a fancy restaurant, held open the door, walked me home, and made me cum three times before he got his.
When I told her I was deaf and took my hearing aids out at night to sleep, she said it must be nice not having to hear drunken roommates having awkward sex late at night.
I just got home and spray-tanned my boyfriend. That's the side of relationships they don't tell you about...
So! As of five minutes ago I've officially masturbated in every room in my apartment
Dude, I helped you move in yesterday...
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
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