direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
she asked me what the final straw was. i had to tell her i caught him jerking off to digimon porn. i don't know what i'm more upset by, that he was masturbating to cartoons, or that he was masturbating to sub-par cartoons
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
It's underwear night and I am literally in the bar wearing nothing but underwear and flip flops.
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
He told me the hickey on the side if his neck was actually a "bruise" from hitting a bird on his motorcycle. I'm not sure what's more impressive, the fact people believed him due to the size of the mark or the fact you gave it to him.
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
Yea it's also hard to turn down a man asking you out with a chicken sandwich.
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
I didn't know that all of his brothers would be hot and musical too. That's a dick move on behalf of biology.
I have never in my life been turned down for sex until this weekend.
Welcome to my everyday.
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
That's the 3rd negative pregnancy test this month. I'm on a roll.
Randomize
