Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
I just remembered I gave a homeless man a ride to his bridge last night.
i was like a deer caught in headlights with its coke-dick hanging out
I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
Holy fuck, spaghetti burritos are the best idea I've ever had.
Note to self: semen does not count as food to take medicine with
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
There's cereal in my underwear. Was I in your apartment at any time last night? That's the only logical explanation for this.
So you're on like a list there now..."Do not under any circumstances give this person a knife. Serve them in plastic cups ONLY"
I'm eating ice cream out of my purse
I really want to stop getting this drunk. I've got the Sunday scaries and it's only Saturday
Randomize
