He could be your dad!
We discussed that right before he asked for my number
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
Well I let her practice her tattooing on me. This shaky dragon on my arm says Im getting laid.
A few days ago I apparently came up, asked her to make me soup, and handed her a can of coconut milk.
Trying to decide who to DD on the fourth and I came up with a Who's who of guys I've hooked up with in the last month. Not an ideal situation, but I have a feeling it's gonna happen anyway.
Your mission, should you decide to accept it, is to pick up rum, beer, and cigarettes. Your holiday will self-destruct if you ignore this message.
My sunday was babysitting three big, drunk, crying Swedes. Unless your day involved four or more giant drunk swedes I don't want to hear about it.
I think your husband is breaking up with me...
You don't know how skeptical I was about letting a guy with braces go down on me
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
I went to a party last night....I stole all of their ornaments and the toaster oven.
Now i know i wasnt that drunk... So why are there texts of me volunteering for a nude photo shoot for an art major student?
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
Randomize
