do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
I just want to make him a cookie cake that says "you have no chance with me."
Yea i traded my bed for half a bag of jimmy johns jalepno chips, am I proud of it no, Am I happy I did it? yes
Soo I have a handle of 100 proof captain, cupcakes, and nothing to get up for in the morning.. This blizzard is shaping up to be a great night.
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
Shes been standing with her arms crossed in front of the mirror for 45 minutes...she told me she's "getting sober"
i think i had a heart attack, prayed, and jizzed my pants.all at once.
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
I found them on a couch next to the sidewalk screaming at cars with a megaphone. Kevin chased the mailman with a jello shot.
When you hit the 45 minute mark of any argument about The Flintstones, you have to realize: it's no longer you arguing, it's the cocaine arguing.
Is "incoherent" a legit goal to strive for tonight? Or should I stay sober enough to fuck who I can?
I've been called an asshole for a lot of things in my life, but I never thought it would be because of potatoes
Almost caused a huge accident on the highway because I was distracted by how orange the road barrels were
My mom just busted me rolling a blunt on her bathroom counter. ...all she said was fuck it it's Christmas
If I take a couple more shots I won't even know he's a Mormon that drives a motorcycle
Randomize
