The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
Only girl at that party wearing a fake beard and I STILL get laid...
I always figured rock bottom would've involved more hookers
I'm also 95% sure I had a conversation with someone on how hard it would be to jerk off with out opposable thumbs
And I swear to god I'll divorce you if you so much as say a single sentence in Yoda talk in our bedroom. I may be a nerd but that's just fucking creepy
She straight up told me, "I don't care if he films as long as he's quiet." You sure you can't find the camera?
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
Crowning achievement. I bought ranch dressing and emergency contraception.
You said this was your mistake shot and then vomited on the tv. Never forget.
My phone just put together a highlight reel of yesterday's dick pic session, set to music and everything
Are you feeling better yet?
I need a nap and a new butthole
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
So, random question. How much should you tip a Lyft driver when you realized you've fucked his sister? Asking for a friend.
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
Randomize
