Just saw a Mexican guy pushing a stroller with 3 twelve packs of corona in it with a toddler struggling to keep up on foot behind him
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
it's all fun and games til I text you in last nights clothes with a head bleed
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
When your grandma invites you to a sweet girls' Valentine's dinner with your mom and sister, but you have to decline because you're trying to get two dudes to rail you at once...
Why are there 17 orders of shrimp lo mein in the bathtub?
I got here. Mom yelled "drink of the day is blueberry sangria" and next thing I knew I was on a slip and slide.
He’s exactly what I’m looking for: he’s got a broken heart, a working penis and a new boat!!!
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