I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
We had to use the stains on Phil's shirt to try to piece together what happened last night.
planned parenthood is perfect for picking up chicks...they all put out
they just named my boobs. Lefty is "Guenevere" and Righty is "I claim this boob for America"
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
I'm starting to second guess shaving my vagina over the kitchen sink. The lighting is so much better though.
You tried tipping the cashier at Cook Out by shoving a dollar bill down his shirt and yelling "Magic Mike"
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
It's whatever. Titanic is about to be on and we have wine, which is basically crying juice. Leo, Kate, and I will be having a lovely, pants free evening.
valentines day is a day for loved ones to share. So me and my vibrator. Happy holidays.
I've had your balls on my face a bunch of times so the least you could do is buy a girl some dinner.
FUCK YOU IM DRINKING WINE FROM A BOX
You okay there or need a ride? Maybe a straw for your box
Maybe a straw...
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