Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
Tell her she's as useless as a condom.
I should be nowhere even remotely near facebook in this condition.
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
What's worse: not calling my parents in Dallas to make sure they're alright or not taking shelter to masturbate all over my douchebag roommates clothes?
I worry about you.
I had to put a towel over my laptop because the little power light was too bright. New hangover low.
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
PokemonGo as navigation to get some at 5:13 AM. Life choices, yo.
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
You know the story of the boner party, right? They got stuck in the mountains and ate each other?
It was the Donner party... boner party was the porn version...
Randomize
