maybe you should take the dick out of your mouth before you start talking.
i did. i'm using it as a microphone.
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
I smell like I just crawled out of a bottle of champagne and landed on the floor of taco bueno.
You're getting a blowjob this afternoon. This has been your morning public service announcement.
I legit just woke up on my couch, snuggled up next to some guy who's wearing my roommate's pink bathroble. What the fuck do they put in those shots?
I made him leave at 3am, he texted me a couple minutes later and said the elevator was broken and he was sleeping in there, but he said I was worth it so I don't feel guilty
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
We have such a parasitic relationship. But the kind where the parasite benefits from the relationship. Like the pilot fish and a shark. The fish gets the leftover food scraps from the shark and the shark gets a free bath from it.
that's so insightful.
Ya i'm marrying the man who can hear/smell this level of flatulence and stick around
Randomize
