So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
I think he was having a seizure but nobody knew because 'what is love' was playing
Why did you video tape me drying my boxers in the microwave?
my brother wants to know why there are wet balloons in his bed and i think you forgot to throw the condoms away but im too hungover to check if thats what hes talking about
We left around 4 AM after the stripper showed no mercy and dropped into a split on Matt's nose. Massive nosebleed.
She set an alarm on my phone for her birthday. Place: Her bed.
Just did a walk of shame dressed as a cowgirl and walked past his ex's entire sorority. Yippee kye aye, motherfucker.
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
she woke me up with a blowjob, mickey mouse pancakes, a mugshot of my ex in county jail, and tequilla. Do you know if she fucked someone behind my back or did i win the vagina lottery?
All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
You fell out of the chair and then lifted your foot saying, "If my foot could give you the middle finger it would."
That was before I lit my hair on fire
So I have three weeks to get rid of his girlfriend and fuck him senseless before he goes to jail
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