She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
Am I over stepping my bounds if I ask to fuck in your new bathroom?
It has heated floors
Are you stuck outside of your house because you forgot to walk up stairs? Cuz I've been there.
Shout out to this stomach virus for helping me prepare for whatever slutty Halloween costume I decide to wear.
American Eric just peed on us from the second floor. Hes now very confused as to why his "toilet is yelling." Send help.
I woke up with Pop Rocks stuck to my ass
Spotify knows me way to well. You mention swinger club and guess what it shuffles to? Danger Zone by Kenny Loggins
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
Stranded. In bathroom stall. No toilet paper. I repeat NO TOILET PAPER! Assistance needed asap. GO! GO! GO!
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