Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
apparently red wine has the total opposite effect that whiskey does on his dick
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
Now one day I will be able to tell my children how a drag queen in a gay bar told mommy that bin laden was dead
i havent blinked in 235 seconds. now 247. now 258. 263. 267. 271. i also have been gifted with theability to both type and count and not blink. 293 so magical
Yeah. He can't come because his mom found the pizza box under his bed with my underwear in it. He acted confused, guess because i forgot to tell him..
I am far too hungover to deal with the fact I can hear you masturbating in the bathroom.
I know everybody has skeletons in their closet but why are all of mine so slutty?
That rando I gave head to on the beach just endorsed me on LinkedIn for Oral Communication Skills. So there's that.
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
wait did i hook up with someone in mcdonalds last night?
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
Randomize
