so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
I woke him up and he was mumbling something about it being moist, or he peed himself but it was okay.
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
She kept pulling joints out of her bra and asking strangers for birthday hugs.
I had so much drainage I couldn't moan properly. Fuck allergy season
Instead of more alcohol, I decided to drink tea. Lets slow clap it out for me
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
Man i fell asleep on a random persons porch on the way home and woke up to the family banging on the windows trying to wake me up
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
Realization: many of my behaviors would lead to me being stoned to death in a lot of foreign countries. God bless America.
Randomize
