Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
I remembered to bring wine in a nalgene bottle, but I forgot sunscreen and water. I'm starting to question my life decisions.
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
My boyfriend sold my favorite shoes right off my fucking feet last night outside the bar. It might have played a part in our breakup today.
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
I just ordered a "football meatlong" from subway
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
He gave me an extra phone charger for the other side of the bed the other night. Is that love?
You know something is wrong with your lifestyle when you have to clean easy Mac cheese powder off of your scale
at least it's not cocaine like last time
She fucked a bartender in a closed Applebee’s and has the nerve to call me easy
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