Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me.
That wasn't intended for you, my bad.
i made potato chips in weed oil. what did you do today?
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
After so many times of carrying your puked covered clothes home in a bag on a Tuesday morning, you begin to realize that Fucked Up Mondays aren't a real thing.
God fucking bless the man who invented the vibrator. Bless him and all his descendants. I think I saw the face of God tonight
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
I'm pretty sure even the managers want me to show up hungover my last day, it would be negligent and disrespectful to do otherwise
Give me like 5, I have to feed a moose and find my pants.
Just landed in Atlanta. Still drunk. I can't feel my face
This is the most exciting thing since movie theater hand jobs
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