I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
Tell your sister I'm no fool. Or at least romanticize the notion of the fool.
that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
she called me screaming that i shouldn't ignore her phone calls, because she's not trying to get me to hang out with her and she doesn't want to be my girlfriend, she just wants sex.
what did you do?
i asked her out. that's so hot.
In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
I want to get so wasted that I make middle aged irish men look like mormon girls
He wore homemade jorts on our first date. I'm not sure if I should leave now or embrace the white trash lust and marry him
Theres a truck parked on the front yard and i just want to take this opportunity to tell you now that it is not my fault.
Were making Christian mingle accounts. First one to get laid doesn't pay bar tabs for a month.
Challenge accepted. See you in hell.
Did you blow the guy you weren't supposed to hook up with again in the bathroom of pita pit? Cause that happened last night...
I have a bruise on dick where you tried to "high five" me.
I just need like a magic vacuum to suck everything out of me and then an IV to put good stuff back in
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
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