Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
you hand the children out the window. i'll pour the drinks.
I'm a terrible person. There are two guys speaking sign language on the metro platform and at first I thought they were drunk and doing a silly dance.
Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
I was about to watch some really classy porn. Title was ravenous for dick. I didnt know pornstars knew ravenous was a word.
Any little, cute, petite blondes with you?
Nah, I got some slutty brunettes though.
Yes I was being legit. That's the only plant I want in my house. A growing penis.
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
Its like a zucchini between his legs. An orgasmic zucchini.
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
There was confetti in my vomit this morning... Happy New Year!!
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
Randomize
