Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
Apparently shes in the bathroom puking but eating a pot roast she found in the fridge at the same time.
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
A girl pulled up next to me at a stoplight just now, looked around for a second, and then changed her top, bra and all, before the light turned green. New. Hero.
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
Someone with the Instagram name "hymenbreaker" just liked a photo of me and my grandma. I feel ashamed.
Trying to ignore the fact that a kid I hooked up with twice just gave me spare keys to his house ... and car.
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
You know shits really hit the fan when you start using public bathroom air freshener spray as perfume
what? where are you?
Randomize
