It must be a full moon weekend. All of my weird booty calls are coming out of the woodwork. I spent 40 minutes on the phone last night telling one why he is so creepy.
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
Is it weird if I ask my drug dealer to prom? Be honest.
The dentist just giggled when he accidentally shot water across my face, I can sense how he treats women.
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
You won’t make it to November. A 21st bday and Halloween in the same night has shitshow/ jail written all over it. So I call dibs on that tall guy
I'm hungover as hell. I'm dying. I have no skin left on my knees
Please rescue me. but take your time, im getting pizza
Well then sir I'll probably see you tomorrow after my class and at 3 with your clothes off. Sounds like a solid way to start the weekend to me
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
Like I blink, and he's face first in my vagina.
you put your dick on my shoulder this morning like it was a fucking parrot
All I know is I woke up in the back seat of my car, with the engine on, and my gps navigated to florida.
Randomize
