Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
we got 12 live crabs and then we got really stoned and know we're playing with the crabs. thats nom watermellon nom. now i'm plaing with a crap whos such a gentleman
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
You told me you would ride a pig into the night sky screaming, "I wear my sunglasses at night"
The Winnie the Pooh costume was great until you got drunk and started yelling at the kids asking for pictures.
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
I just fell in love with a beard, the guy it's attached to isn't great but I think I'm going to take one for the team
60% of the guys I've slept with are on my holiday greeting card mailing list. I'm an amazing ex lover.
I appreciate the I'll come bail you out of jail tone in the text
I've never had to kick an employee out of bed to go to work before.
Randomize
