I smell stomach acid.
Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
Arguably, the best part was cockblocking those squirrels.
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
Dude he was freaking out because he thought he was walking on crates, and he just kept saying help me
Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
you know you've had too much sex when your vagina hurts when you laugh
I like to imagine god has to get plastered to deal with the fact that he made you and me
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
My desire to pee is a lot higher than my need to be buzzed right now.
I told you that you couldn’t eat fifty tacos, you slapped me in the face, ate seventeen tacos, and fell asleep on my floor
I tried saying sorry but instead I puked down her shirt and tried to clean it up... Now I have a bruise on my forehead. good news, before she left she wrote her number on my stomach with sharpie
Randomize