You ran away and I found you three blocks later lying by a dumpster because "that's where your life belongs"
I know ur sleeping, sorry for waking you but i just saw a girl with mittens on using her nose to control her ipod touch
Gym doesn't open till 11. I'm sure that of the other four people waiting in the lobby, I'm the only one still drunk and only going to the gym to shower.
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
also I just used a straw to drink the juice out of a tomato b/c I forgot how to bite.
dude literally just took me 4 trips to take out the recycling from last night. we need to have parties like this more often
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
you trust me enough to eiffel tower a girl but don't trust me with a mallet wtf happened to our friendsship
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
The number of tpain songs that actually relate to my life right now is embarrassing.
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
There's lube on my homework. #priorities
OMG OMG OMG Ive hit the penis jackpot
It seriously took everything in my power not to sleep with him
What did it come out and serenade you? Lol
It sang to me in the dark. It was magical
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