if I could go back to kindergarten and not fuck up my life, I so would.
America approved of our night. A bald eagle flew over us at 7am
i will replace your cream cheese. there's enough for breakfast. you are my friend. i had guests we wanted bagels so bad im sorry. i left you notes. i love you. you have enough for a bagel or two and i will get you more. you are so pretty.
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
Am I really in your phone as Asshole Jesus??
Hey, I shot that toilet dead center, drunk, from at least 6 ft away. I'm a fuckin awesome shot. You guys were completely safe.
Yes, that toilet won't be hurting anyone anymore.... Hahaha
Buy Actually if the police need to find my body I'm on an air mattress in an apartment near a McDonald's that's all I see out dat Window
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
I'll be the Broncos and you be the Seahawks and you can pound the shit out of me.
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
I'm so bored I talked to the Bible guys for 30 minutes.
I offered them beer last time they came here bahaha
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
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