dude my grandmas the shit. she has a sixth grade education and got hit by a car when she was 18. she cant smell.
I just pulled a feather out of my vagina.
I am not joking.
i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
do you know what's more awkward than a positive pregnancy in a public bathroom?
not a thing
walking in on a stranger's positive pregnancy test in a public bathroom
I taped Calvin and Kyles heads together face to face while they were passed out. You should have seen them stumbling around using hungover teamwork trying to find scissors.
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
Can we make a pact that if we're 40 and still sluts that aren't married we can get civil unioned the fuck up and raise an asian baby as our own?
Donating $10 to Sandy victims for every hurricane I drink tomorrow. Buying me alcohol just became a good cause.
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
So worth it. Come over for bacon egg cheese vusquit later. 12. I slept with Jimmy? On my period? And told him he had mother issues? No tequila. Tequila bad.
He's slurring his text. I didn't think that was possible.
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
At some point you said you just wanted to get laid, so we had a moment of silence for your dead sex life...
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