He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
this boner is exhausting
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
APPARENTLY giving your friend one of your shoes so that you avoid the no shoes no service rule makes you drunk...
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
Good lord, they've set up every firework to be ignited by a trail of gasoline at midnight. God save us all.
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
told our landlord the hole in the wall was from your head during drunk sex..
how did he take it?
not as well as i would have thought
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
"I made out with someone too, but then he tried to fuck and I played dead"
He walked in on me banging his sister and said "you're both old enough to make you own decisions. Carry on"
We can't go out this weekend. My uterus is so desperate it's given me permanent beer goggles
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
Randomize
