You were asking people if they could pee on you while you shotgunned beers
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
I wanna get shitfaced and yell about Tim tebow
Maybe we could get a groupon for vasectomy. I'm game.
its before 9am and ive already had to dip my dick and balls in a glass of milk. probably isnt a good sign for how today is going to go.
I haven't had a normal poop since halloween, we are not mixing vodka and tequila ever again
RESPECT THE VODQUILA
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
Apparently I was telling them, "I AM A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN AND I DON'T NEED YOU TO HOLD MY HAIR," and I pulled my hair back and puked.
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
I should've negotiated that before I sat on his face.
Banged a girl last night wearing nothing but my Team USA Olympic jersey. I think it's safe to say that nut was for America.
Randomize
